Chapter Eight - Leaving the Hospital/creating a zen garden

CHAPTER EIGHT - Leaving the Hospital/Creating a Zen Garden - July 2003
As far as hospitals go, this one is not too bad. I am on a new floor, one specifically for cancer patients, so the staff is used to dealing with the type of disease. The Nurses and technicians are efficient with their care, as well as kind and compassionate. The view is one of the Clinic's campus, quite expansive, and pretty at the same time. With all that going for them, a hospital is a hospital. They are cold, sterile and somewhat depressing. You sleep in two hour increments all day and night long because the staff is coming in checking on you, giving you meds, taking temperatures and asking you questions. Your options are to lie there and read, or lie there and watch television, or sleep. If you are not immobile, or hooked up to too many IV's, you can get up and roam the hallways. I am an active person so I opt for getting up and walking as often as possible. I feel it makes the healing process faster, it certainly makes me feel better mentally as well as physically. Even though I am sick I get up and move whenever possible.
My fever was finally under control after a week in the hospital, my port was installed and I was ready to go home. If I could do cartwheels down the hall and end in a victory motion with both arms fully extended upward, giving the Nixon peace sign with both hands I would. The stay in the hospital took a toll on me and my family. Everyone was happy to have me coming home, but I looked thin and unhealthy so I thought we needed to do something to jump start our joy.
I remembered how wonderful I felt relaxing on my sister Angie's deck, basking in the beauty of the flowers and plants. The energy was positive and uplifting, perfect for reflection, prayer or tranquil moments. Mike, the kids and I decided to create our own soothing environment on our own deck. Our backyard backs up to a forest and every Spring Mike works diligently planting flowers along the edge of the woods creating an array of color that looks beautiful just by being there. The family wanted to bring some of that color through flowers and plants onto the deck.
Mike went to one of his favorite places, Home Depot, to purchase plants, dirt, flowers, a small portable waterfall which could be hung on the deck, paint and pots. In true Mike fashion, he bought too much, he likes to go overboard when accomplishing a task. The girls painted the red clay pots in bold, beautiful colors to make them bright and cheerful. When everyone's hard work was done our deck was transformed into a meditation getaway. It was wonderful. Mike, as always, ended up doing most of the work, digging and planting well into the evening hours. As I said, he takes an idea and just runs with it to an extreme level. At times this quality drives me crazy, but I also appreciate him for it.
As the rest of my family slept , excitement woke me early the next day, our tranquil deck awaited. I came down to the kitchen and made myself a cup of green tea. It is supposed to contain many antioxidants which are positive properties for the immune system, the healing structures of the body. The rays of the sun were just starting to peek over the trees. The birds were chirping and flying around. Nature was waking up, it seemed, just for my enjoyment.
Morning, before the rest of the world wakes up is my favorite time of day. It is a fresh start, the promise of a new beginning, the choices we have are endless. I took a long deep breath to bring in the smell of the air and trees and flowers, it was fresh and sweet and full of possibilities. This action made me feel strong. I visualized this breath bringing healthy life into my body, picturing myself well and vibrant. I prayed to God to let me live, to heal me, or show me the way to heal myself. After sitting there for an hour or so thinking over my plight, I felt renewed and ready to take on the day and the journey that lie ahead for me, convincing myself that I could do this.
This would be my morning ritual from here on out when weather provided. If I couldn't go outside I would find a room or space where I could create the same calm, relaxed, positive feeling.
Advice
If you are well enough and the staff has okayed it, get up and move in the hospital, even if it is just a few steps. Try to make small progressions each time you attempt activity.
When you get home, continue moving in a safe manner, walk around the house or your block if you feel up to it.
Create a comforting place or room where you are free of stress to meditate, pray, or just relax in. Try to visualize yourself healthy and strong.